I've actually had this discussion with several folks over the years: I am not a feminist.
Bold, I know. But while I love girl power and agree that women should certainly have equal rights to men and that we can do jobs and things just as competently, I very much acknowledge that there are gender roles. This is the 'un-feminist' part of me. I wholeheartedly believe that men and women were created with very different yet equally vital roles. This is not going to be a post about politics or religion, nobody panic. That's a blog for another day.
What I'm getting at is this:
Society wants to make me feel bad about the fact that I genuinely WANT to be taken care of. It's not that I'm incapable of doing it, I've been handling my own affairs quite nicely for some time now, thanks very much. I also spend a great deal of time caring for other people and I'm pretty damn good at that, too. But what I want is a man who cares for me and is capable of supporting me emotionally and even through little acts of kindness. *sigh* Okay, so here's the deal.
We went and watched Seven Pounds last night. It was me and two of my closest friends, who both happen to be guys. I don't want to post any movie spoilers, but let me just say this: there are two seemingly small things that Will Smith's character does for this one particular woman that are SO thoughtful but SO simple that it broke my heart with longing to be taken care of in that manner.
There is something so beautiful and right about people loving each other through the little things. For example, one of my favorite couples has this down to a pretty good science: she makes him lunch every day and takes care of the house and he fills the gap when she's not well or does cute little surprise things for her.
It speaks VOLUMES about a person's capacity to love and how well they know someone by how they handle the little things. And that's what I want. Unapologetically. I want to be taken care of in the little things.
So, end of sappy and less than eloquent blog. :-)
2 comments:
You definatly made my day..and I agree...its all in the little things...
Don't forget..we have a God of Infinate details :)
What you want doesnt make you not a feminist, it is not inherently opposite of what being a feminist means.
"Feminists want women and men to be treated with equal respect; to be given equal opportunity to express their potential and to be appreciated for their contribution; to have choices about the families they create, the jobs they hold, and the political resources at work to eliminate exploitation, discrimination, oppression, abuse and violence." ("Im not a feminist, but... Popular Myths About Feminism).
You can want what you want and call yourself a feminist, I want what you want as well. Its kind of like saying Im not a vegetarian because I dont mind other people eating meat. Im not trying to argue here I just have heard this Im not a feminist statement a lot from women who at least in my opinion hold feminist beliefs and I wish would stand up and say it!
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